Looking for Advice
It is to a young lady (14 y/o) I wrote to her in 1988:
That is not to say that I will not answer someone who writes to me with a problem or who just wants to have a sympathetic ear to tell their fears or doubts to. Of course I would be happy to offer the benefit of my advice, but that is not my purpose in writing the book, nor, I'm afraid, would my advice necessarily be sage.
I have a theory I have developed over the span of my 48 (soon to be 49) years of existence. If this theory conflicts with your ethical or theological upbringing, just put it down to the prattling of an old man and dismiss it from your mind. My theory is this: God has/will place many obstacles in our path while we are maturing. The way in which we meet and overcome those obstacles or fail to overcome them, will shape our character. The obstacles will take many forms but most probably will be in the form of either emotional or physical pain. You have un-
doubtedly experienced some of this at the parting from the young man you had a strong feeling for and which caused you to write your poem that you mentioned. I'm sure that parting was painful, but it is what we grown-ups (there's that nasty word again) call puppy love.
I sincerely hope you have many more such loves in your life, but keep in mind that as steadfast as your love may seem at the time, at your age, it is not likely to be a permanent relationship and you will part once again, and yes, it's liable to be painful. The way in which you overcome that pain, and continue with life, will strengthen your character for the next encounter. This is called maturing.
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